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November 17th, 2009
12:28 pm - :(
Well, Harlie died last night. They think she got into rat poison. Alex is devastated. I'm devastated that he's devastated. And I miss her.
It was just so sudden. We can't ever catch a break.
Rest in peace baby Harlie.
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November 5th, 2009
10:32 pm
Alex and I used to dance.
We don't anymore.
We don't cuddle anymore. We don't slow dance anymore.
We don't giggle as much.
I feel like he's bored.
I don't know what else I can do to be more exciting.
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November 4th, 2009
09:16 pm - My hair is wet, it's hot in here and it's freezing outside.
I'm pretty excited about school now. I really hope that I like psychology because I can really see myself being a couples/sex therapist for the rest of my life. People say that fits me. I don't really know what I'm supposed to think about that, so I just say "thanks!" and move on.
I have a math test tomorrow that I really hope I do well on. Only 3 more weeks of school until the last day of class! As if I'm not stressed out enough. I need to bring up my history grade too. I should actually be writing a paper right now...
I don't think I mentioned this, but Alex and I got a puppy. An English Bulldog puppy. I kind of like her. Kind of. She's cute and all, but she's terrible.
Next Saturday, Alex and I have been basically dating for like, 6 months. No specific date with us. That's the way he wanted it. Whatev. I think we're going back to his parent's house for the weekend next weekend (the 13th, 14th, and 15th) I love going up there. I love his family. I love everything about him. I haaaaate Thursdays, but I have lecture at 9:30 and should probably go to bed. Nothing exciting happens in my life!
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November 1st, 2009
11:15 am
Halloween sucked. I worked in the morning, waited for Alex to get off ALL night, and then when he did he wanted to do nothing but sit with his roommate and drink beer. Fantastic boyfriend he was last night.
I feel like there's something missing. I've been on edge for the past few days and it's really starting to take a toll on me. I'm moody and emotional and I can't even stand myself. All I want to do lately is sleep and think about everything over and over again.
Something's missing.
I'm hoping it's not you...
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October 19th, 2009
12:07 am - 'Cause I stole your soul.
I don't really have all that much to say, but I'm going to write anyway because I'm in one of those moods.
College is now officially kicking my ass. Fuck history & algebra. Seriously.
I get tears in my eyes all the time lately. I'm not really sure what's gotten into me, but I have a heart this week. So emotional.
I'm tired of my roommate/friends going home every weekend. How lame is that? Go to college, and don't experience it? Makes no sense to me. I NEED TO GET OUT MORE.
I also need more friends outside of Alex's circle of friends. I want my own. I'm tired of being his tag along.
I cant wait to see Steven Fiore this Fridayyy! & the homecoming game Saturday!, and the fair Sundayyy! Good weekend coming up :)
I should get some sleep. I have my 8 a.m. discussion tomorrow.
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September 14th, 2009
11:30 am - :)
I love how in love we are.
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September 9th, 2009
08:02 pm - I'm not sure what's going on...
But I know that my life is slowly piecing itself back together.
I think I'm going to change my major to psychology specializing in relationships. Yes, a sex therapist. I think I would be completely happy doing that for the rest of my life. Don't laugh. I'm serious.
I really want something that loves me. Not like, a baby, because I'm not stupid, but something that depends on me that requires less hassle. Like a puppy, or even a fish. (I didn't bring my fish to college because I don't want to accidently kill her here). I don't know, I just want to take care of something.
I have ALOT of history reading to do, and I'm going to try to get that accomplished while Carianne's in the tanning bed.
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September 2nd, 2009
12:37 am - .
I've never been this broken.
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August 31st, 2009
01:33 pm - Hope.
I'm hoping things will start coming out of the woodwork for me.
like what I'm supposed to do with my life, where I'll end up, things like that. It seems everyone else knows but me, and it gets to me. I hate inconsistency and the unknown aspects of my life. I do know that I'm going back to Florida when I graduate. Hands down. That's where I want to raise my family (if someone ever stupidly decides to marry me). I've always said that ever since I moved here from there, but now I know that's where I want to be.
On another note, I love college. I love the atmosphere. I love going to class at separate times of the day and not all at once. I love my U101 class and my dance class. Marine Science: Easy. The only thing I worry about is History, but I'm now starting to get the hang of it. I've been trying to better myself lately. I've even thought about maybe going to church? It's a stretch, but maybe. I also want to start tanning again, and keeping myself pampered as far as nails and stuff go. It just makes me feel better and I should be loving myself right now. I've made a lot of new friends so far. It's crazy how nice these people are and how much they actually like me. Not a usual thing for me to have a lot of girl friends, but I like it :) They get me through my days.
Happy.
Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: Taylor Swift-Crazier
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12:07 am - it will all get better,
in time.
what a rough weekend.
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August 26th, 2009
11:25 am - :/
college is good.
living with carianne is good.
love life with Alex isnt. right now.
sigh.
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August 12th, 2009
11:52 pm - :/
I'm starting to get all sentimental and mushy. I move out in 2 dayssss!
I'm getting my haircut, again, today. Maybe they can fix this mess. I still have quite alot to buy and not enough money. It sucks that my dad's birthday, Rachel's birthday, Alex's birthday and my brother's birthday are all practically in the same two week period. I already bought Alex's present. We're going to see TBS, Fall Out Boy (lol), The All American Rejects and Asher Roth in Charlotte in Oct as his birthday present. I'm sitting on my bed and for some reason there are random ants every 10 minutes. And my bed is like, really clean. I don't even eat in it. Weird. I have no idea where they're coming from. I can't decide whether or not to use this twitter bullshit. It looks pretty dumb to me. I'm rambling and should probably just go to bed.
Goodnight!
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August 10th, 2009
09:17 pm - !
what am I doing?
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August 3rd, 2009
08:30 pm - so,
I need a new purse. NOW. & I'm so ready to move out. I finally got all of my dorm stuff. It's not what I wanted, but I'll have to settle considering I have a time limit. Alex is in NC for the week, and I guess I'm helping him move in on Friday.
I've been too productive today.
I don't think anyone even reads this?
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July 30th, 2009
01:01 am - this is not
what I thought it was going to be.
I felt way more than I had expected to.
oh, life.
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July 27th, 2009
08:27 pm - legal.
I turn 18 tomorrow. About fucking time.
I have a feeling tomorrow is going to suck.
I hate my birthdays. They're never fun.
I'm just a glass of sunshine, aren't I?
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May 21st, 2009
05:29 pm - Update:
My life is a mess.
I'm graduating high school in 9 days.
My love life is fucked up right now. or at least, that's how it feels. my fault.
I think I'll move to another country and start over. sounds good.
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January 22nd, 2009
12:47 am
Things are changing really fast for me.
I have to decide where I want to go to school for the next four years of my life in 3 months.
Second semester is easy now that I dropped Spanish 3. It's just weird that this is my last semester of high school.
I don't feel old enough.
I need to lose weight.
I'm going to go to the gym everyday when I go to college.
I wish I was in Florida.
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December 2nd, 2008
08:01 pm - December
I love December.
December 6- Miss LE
December 13- Winter Formal
December 10- Last day of english for the next 3 years!
December 25- Christmas
December 31- New Years!
so, so much too look forward to right now.
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November 6th, 2008
09:28 pm - I've wasted
my time on entirely too many people.
im sick of being walked all over.
im sick of being taken for granted.
im sick of trying so hard.
im sick of the weather changing so much.
im sick of not fitting into my clothes.
im sick of not being appreciated.
im sick of being exhausted.
im sick of putting any sort of effort into a friendship that doesnt mean shit now.
fuck all of you.
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